There seems to be increased awareness today of the critical need for positively coping with negative emotions. Because of this, there is a magnitude of resources offering methods and practical approaches for dealing with issues such as depression, fear, anger, grief, rejection, and more. Many of these are helpful, some are not. Regardless of the effectiveness of any of these means, the point is that at some point in life everyone faces challenges that have the potential to affect his or her emotional state. And it’s precisely for these times that we need a productive pathway forward to healing and wholeness. Not surprisingly, the Bible includes a highly effective manner for responding to life’s heartaches and hurts through the practice of praying a lament.
Lamenting: What it is, What it’s not
Lamenting is the desperate cry for help offered to a compassionate God who hears, listens, and responds. It is a prayerful song of anguish expressing sorrow, pain, anger, and confusion. Additionally, lamenting is one of the principal ways believers in Yahweh have processed grief throughout biblical history.
It is a safe and secure method for real people, using real language to describe real feelings to a real God who really cares.
Lamenting is not mindless venting. Neither is it irreverent. Instead, it is an authentic, productive manner for releasing despair to a good Father who sympathizes with our sorrows and comforts us in our pain.
The Reason to Lament
There are many wonderful benefits that result from lamenting. However, of most significance to me is what it produces in the heart of the lamenter.
You see it is only through the positive process of lamenting that the lamenter is brought to the conclusion that God is faithful, good, and sovereign regardless of his circumstances. And further, the lamenting process leads him to the realization he is not alone in His pain.
Lament is a safe and secure method for real people, using real language to describe real feelings to a real God who really cares.
Because God created us, He also understands us. And this is why He’s not shocked by our words. In fact, He has foreknowledge of our words before they are spoken. (See Psalm 139:4.) Our feelings are safe with Him. God does not judge, condemn us, or punish us for being honest with Him. Instead, He invites us to come to Him just as we are; burdens, baggage, dirty laundry, and all.
The Language of Lament
The language of lament is not necessarily lyric or poetic as is true of most of the psalms. Instead, it is often unfiltered and emotionally driven. And we see this in emphatic cries for help such as Hear Me!, Listen To Me!, Help Me!, Save Me!, Deliver Me!, and Free Me!.
In addition, the repeated phrase How long? is a common question included in many laments such as:
- How long Oh Lord?
- How long will you forget me?
- How long must I struggle?
- How long will my enemies have the upper hand?
- How long will you hide your face from me?
And finally, lamenters unashamedly request vengeance on their enemies, for justice to be served, and punishment to be executed on the wicked.
While it is true that lamenters speak candidly and honestly, it’s critical to understand that their words are either inwardly focused, sung in community, or directed to God. The point being that lamenters do not use their words as weapons intended for others. Instead, their words are directed and spoken purposefully and constructively.
The Results of Lament
There are many wonderful benefits that result from lamenting. However, of most significance to me is what it produces in the heart of the lamenter.
You see it is only through the positive process of lamenting that the lamenter is brought to the conclusion that God is faithful, good, and sovereign regardless of his circumstances. And further, the lamenting process leads him to the realization he is not alone in His pain.
Instead, God hears him, is with him, and is protecting him. And this knowledge is the source of his comfort and assurance.
But you, O Lord, are a shield around me; you are my glory, the one who holds my head high. I cried out to the Lord, and he answered me from his holy mountain. (Psalm 3:3-4 NLT)
Jesus Lamented
In closing, I think it’s worth noting that even Jesus lamented. He lamented personally over the city of Jerusalem (Matthew 23:37-39) and vertically to His Father from the cross (Matthew 27:46 and Psalm 22:1). While these are the only recorded references, I believe that Jesus regularly leaned into lamenting.
I also believe this to be true as life is a mixture of beauty and pain. And while on earth Jesus was fully God, yet fully man. This meant He experienced the same pain, sorrow, and disappointment that we do, however to a far greater degree.
Because of this, the prophet Isaiah described Him as “a Man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief” (Isaiah 53:3). Therefore, it was critical for Jesus to process His pain through lament.
Considering this, I am brought to the conclusion that if even Jesus, the perfect Son of God, needed times of lament, then how much more so do we?
Extend grace to others!
If you’ve been encouraged, strengthened, or edified by this week’s post, please consider sharing Grace Notes for You with a friend.
Song Share of the Week
This week please encourage others by sharing a passage of scripture or a song that you identify with lament. Consider also sharing your connection with the scripture passage or song you’ve chosen. I look forward to reading your responses HERE!
Reflect
Why do you think it’s critical to release pain and sorrow to God in heartfelt lament? In what practical ways (e.g., worship, praying, journaling, confessing, repenting) are you leaning into lament in your journey with God?
Pray
Father God, I am humbled to know you hear me when I pray. Thank you for inviting me to talk to you about everything. Thank you for the privilege of talking freely and honestly with you in prayer about my pain and sorrows knowing you love me. And finally, thank you for the comfort and assurance I receive knowing you are always with me. I am so grateful for your faithful love that never ends. Amen
